“If we’re in line to surpass the Kardashians we can pay off the investors in no time,” Ira said, excited to hear the news.

Grigsby nodded, “People watch those mooks play scrabble and tweeze their eyebrows. Our show is far more entertaining.”

“But we’ll have to raise the stakes Grigs, it’s the only way to stay on top.”

“The live chat room recommendations will do that for us, we’ll scale that up and allow more carnage,” Grigsby said as he sorted through a variety of new silk handkerchiefs for tonight’s show.

Ira clear his throat, “I mean to raise the stakes in the less dangerous areas, perhaps more difficult cerebral obstacles?”

“Sure, we can do that,” Grigsby said, half listening.

Later that afternoon they reviewed the lineup of contestants and obstacles. The new contestants were an all male gymnastics team from the Philippines. They looked like clones; they all had 2% bodyfat, lean cut muscles and sinew veins. None of them were above 5’4. Grigsby liked them. He knew just the obstacle he’d unveil tonight for them. He broached the idea to Ira.

“Where are we going to get 25 bobcats? The Bronx Zoo doesn’t have a rental policy.” Ira said.

“Don’t worry about that, I know a guy. What’s going to be tricky is the sand. We’re going to need a fuckton of sand. Get Joji to fetch some from the shoreline, have the interns help.”

An hour later Joji reluctantly took a tender boat ashore with a pack of their unpaid interns. Joji couldn’t tell what made him more upset, the fact his manicured hands will be ruined from collecting piles of sand. Or the interns ceaseless barage of questions about what are his the life hacks to success. “Strangling my competitors.” Joji thought to himself. Then he smiled and knew it was time to unleash his masterplan.


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